It looks a lot cleaner in this picture than it actually is.
As if I wasn’t already bitter enough about the 45 minutes and $4.20 I spend getting from my house to the Mozo office, this handy-dandy commuter calculator is now rubbing it in all our faces that that time and money could have been far better spent.
My morning routine goes something like this:
6 a.m. My alarm goes off. I bat blindly at my phone until it falls silent.
6.30 a.m. It goes off again. Having zeroed in on its location at 6 a.m., this time I hit the snooze button first go.
7 a.m. My alarm goes off again. I turn it off and tell myself I will get out of bed in 5 minutes.
7.15 a.m. I roll out of bed.
7.50 a.m. I leave the house (commute starts) and walk ten minutes to the train station. Arrive just in time to slide between the closing doors, Indiana Jones style.
8 a.m. Crushed between some guys armpit and some lady’s overstuffed handbag.
8.15 a.m. Still crushed. Can smell something weird.
8.25 a.m. I am nearing the station and the end of my patience with smelly-armpit-guy and huge-handbag-lady.
8.30 a.m. I am expelled from the train on a wave of cranky commuters.
8.35 a.m. Arrive at the Mozo offices (end commute) and spend a few minutes praying that the demonically possessed lifts will deliver me to the correct floor.
8.40 a.m. I am at my desk, ready to crank out some blogs for you lovely people.
I put this adventure into the commuter calculator and was told that my commute is OK-ish. OK-ish. Not Hell-ish, or Gross-ish or even Unpleasant-ish.
This feels like a huge understatement.
Apparently, my commute is 13 minutes shorter than average, but I’ve still spent enough of my working life on the train to watch 4,590 movies. Which is devastating, because I love movies. A 14 day long movie marathon is surely a better use of my time than getting intimate with smelly-armpit-man.
Assuming I retire at 70 and never move house, I’ll have spent a total of $103,950 on my train trip. The calculator was also good enough to inform me that, had I repurposed that money and spent it investing in property instead, I could have a 48 square metre house in Bali right now.
Or, alternatively, a little over 1/123rd of Gwyneth Paltrow’s flat.
But the real kicker is that the average Aussie apparently spends $72,765 on their commute over their working life. I, however, will spend approximately $103,950.
I can only assume that the extra $31,185 is thanks to Sydney’s ridiculous public transport prices. So, feeling righteously ticked off, I went and did some research into whether or not Sydney is an expensive commuter hell.
The results were underwhelming. We’re only number 16 on the list of expensive public transport at about $3.42 (which, it should be noted, is quite a bit lower than what I actually pay). Copenhagen tops the list at just over $6.
I’m not sure that this was what the calculator was getting at, but here’s my take on the results: public transport is expensive and I’d rather be watching movies.
If you could skip out on your daily commute and put the money to a better purpose, what would you spend it on?